Four office workers laughing around a desk with a corded phone, studio photograph in the style of 1999 Sydney

Poetry, Briefs And A Phone Mix-Up (Part 1)

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This is an excerpt from a real diary entry from the Diary of a Mad Chaos, written on June 2, 1999. Learn more about the history of the diary

Day Two Without The Chain

It is the second day of the new month and the third day I haven’t worn my golden chain or the golden ‘T’ that goes along with it. If hopes are deceiving then I will not wear that chain until next Friday but if deceit eludes me then it will most best be around my neck by Tuesday. Right now there isn’t much to talk about as I have been relaxing myself from a slightly erroneous day, learning the necessities of common law briefs and getting slightly stressed from it.

Apart from that it was a shocker on the phone where one of them turned out to be a classic with the laughs around the room at my expense. The train was then delayed upon coming home so I had to catch the next bus home at 7:10 p.m., but anyway, let’s not haggle on chronology, let’s get to it.

Showing Off The Baby Blue Top

Beginning with yesterday as I didn’t quite explain myself to the best of my descriptive ability, let me just add a couple of pointers. If not already noted, when I was on the train with Lyssa Monday morning I pulled out my baby blue top to show her what I was returning to Hound Dog (I didn’t return it) and as soon as she had seen what I wore to nightclubs she became quiet and irritated. It was as if Lyssa didn’t want to see how I dressed better because she didn’t want to picture other girls looking and thinking upon me.

Seeing Lyssa how she was dressed and knowing how Lyssa dresses, I felt as if I wanted to show Lyssa just to let her know. I wanted a reaction and got a desired one. I’m not sure why I was shooting for that reaction but in my head I was just hoping that Lyssa would grow resentful of my good taste. Another quick note, I helped a guy on Monday morning get through the ticket gates because his ticket wouldn’t be accepted. I had him go right behind me.

Video Night With Tyler

Jumping now to my being home, I gave Tyler a call because my mum told me he had called. Figuring he just drove to my house an hour beforehand to drop off my jacket that was left in his car on Sunday, I soon found out that he wanted to borrow the tape I have of when we visited Wollongong for his birthday.

Tyler also had the new video taped off Shawn so I asked him to drop over with his video player so we could hook it up and start acquiring what we wanted. Playing some loud music to keep occupied whilst eating, I heard my mum come downstairs, and turning down the system I knew Tyler was at the front door.

Having made him wait a minute or two because I couldn’t hear him I opened the front door and helped him carry in the video player. For the next half an hour we sat around trying to hook up different connections to the back of the two videos so we could get it to work but unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like he brought the right connections. Therefore, we couldn’t work out how to tape from one video to another and just ended up watching the newest video of our playing Gridiron for its twenty minutes.

The video was nothing special, a couple of funny bits in it but it was worth watching for that one time. When all was over I lent Tyler my video so he could watch it tonight with Rochelle when she comes over his house. “Man, I can’t wait to get into her pants,” he had kept saying as he watched her on the video that we taped last Sunday, such caring words and yet, such assuming postulation.

Early Start To The City

Last night I slept at 10:30 p.m. having a reasonable sleep to finally wake up this morning at 5:50 a.m. The alarm jolted me into waking up and after quickly turned it off, my eyes closed for a couple more seconds, but I knew I didn’t want to sleep in because I wouldn’t get up. Stumbling to my feet, I mildly warmed myself up on the heater, threw on some clothes and then headed upstairs for some breakfast comprising of yogurt and a banana.

Having a shower and putting my clothes on later, I suited myself up and then headed out the front door with plenty of time for my bus. Arriving at the train station I caught the next train at 7:33 a.m. to arrive in the City just around 8:30 a.m. I’ve found lately that there are a couple of people from my work but in different sections that catch my same train from the Campbelltown area. There’s this one girl that reminds me of Janice (Goon Girl) who has the same curly hair and forehead, she smiled at me today in recognition of our both coming from Campbelltown.

The lady downstairs in the mailroom seems to have a helpful thing for me in the mornings. Not sure if it’s just her being helpful or my appearance but it seems like she has a touch of something for me. Each morning she hands me my mail, gives me a smile, looks me over careful of being discreet, smiles again, has a word of chat and then I’m off. Tomorrow I might have a little bit more of a chat to her before I head up to work, see what the real story is. I’m sure it won’t be a liking of me because she’s a couple of years more senior but then again, crazier things have happened.

Beauty In The Office

Thalia was already in the office as I made my way up. The front door was opened for me by a lady around my age who looks Lebanese and is good-looking. On this point, I would like to note that there are many beautiful girls working in our office, on the second floor and on the first floor. With time I will make friends with more people in the offices, more women I will know and one day I might be going out to lunch with a sparing few of them.

There is so much beauty to look at in the workplace but I don’t stare. I just glance on occasion and think in my head, “God am I lucky to work in a glamour-infested place like this.” Being the only guy in the legal department is a good thing but having so much women to work with is absolutely fabulous and uplifting. Why quit I say.

Poetry Book And Learning Briefs

Before our work actually commenced I showed my book of poetry to Thalia that I had brought in for that very occasion. Looking rather pleased at my bringing it out she flicked through the song portion first complimenting me on them and then as she got to poems she flicked a little faster. “I’m not very good at converting Old English to normal” she told me as she flicked through my poetry, and deciding a quick flick would be enough for her, we put away my poetry book soon after, but she impressed by the volume of poetry I had written.

From this start in the morning I prepared the incoming mail, handing the correct mail to each Solicitor’s Secretary, photocopying Investigation and Medical Reports and all other assorted duties. Today I found out from Thalia that I have been learning rather good. Back in the first few days of my job I was told by Thalia that she was thrown in the deep end to work out Briefs by herself, in which she only notes to go by.

However, today I learnt that Thalia had done incoming mail, outgoing mail, filing and errands for the first three months and then when the girl who done Briefs went on a holiday she finally had to learn. That made me feel relieved that my little mistakes were finally allowed to be part of normality in learning, as I always thought, “Why can everyone learn all this in one week and it takes me much more, am I stupid”.

Thalia told me she was asked to teach me whatever and she decided to throw me into the deep end and teach me Briefs two days after I started working. In a way it was my fault because I was so eager to learn but I am lucky that I didn’t think of quitting. If I would have quit it would have set back Thalia’s role as Secretary and it would have diminished her confidence in being able to teach someone without them quitting.

Anyway, with eight days under my belt, I believe I have learnt 70% of my role and the last 30% is just a bit more learning and then mostly perfecting my technique. This job I will probably never willingly leave as I have it good. The gym isn’t yet built and we don’t have a sky-rise view but the gym is on its way and who’s to say that we won’t move into a better office because we’re expanding.

Sushi Sticks And A Bird

Today I had lunch at midday after learning how to arrange a Common Law Brief which was a bit harder than normal. This is what stressed me because I didn’t know much of the files in which I had to throw out or sort out but I guess I’m still learning. For lunch I bought myself some more sushi but this time instead of a pack, it was sticks for $1.50, where I bought two, one with avocado and one with crab.

Heading to the evergreen in Hyde Park I sat down to eat what I thought was a delicious meal and because my pocket is a bit short in buying film for my camera, I didn’t buy a drink. One of those bigger birds with the long beaks and saliva dripping out came half a beak length from my food whilst it was still in my hand.

It looked as if the bird was going to sneak up right in front of me and steal my food but I kept him at bay until my last bite and was then on my way. Trying out the train system for the first time I caught the train to St. James as it came straight away, checked out a shirt shop for a shirt I liked and then jumped back on the train to head to Wynyard. Having five minutes to get back to work I done so in time and then began on some more work.

Two Esmes On The Phone

Getting accustomed to more people in whom we dealt with at work was the name of the game in the second half of the day. While everyone was out for lunch I received a call from a barrister in which I called earlier in the day regarding a Brief that I was chasing up. Answering the phone was fine enough with my line but after that I seemed to fall apart in explanation and getting across.

Trying to locate a Brief made me break out in a flush and almost in a sweat and as the barrister told me he didn’t even have that Brief on his hearing list I felt like an idiot but saved the day by telling him that I would call back with more information. However, it wasn’t all my fault because his receptionist left nothing but a number so I could have been speaking to any Tom, Dick or Harry about the Brief. Nevertheless, I feel it was the right person and later in the day ended up telling Thalia but to her it didn’t really matter what the case was.

The guy from the photocopying place at ‘Diskovery’ also came down twice during the day and I greeted them both on both occasions. Then there was the classic incident of my horrific telephone conversation with a call from Jana, the Supervisor and one of my interviewers. Doing my greeting line correctly she asked if she could speak to Esme who was the temp in the next booth but thinking that there was two Esmes, I got confused.

Putting down the phone I told Esme that it was for her but then I jumped back on the phone and asked, “Which Esme do you want to speak to because there are two Esmes in this office,” which confused Jana. From there I finally diverted the call to Esme in the next booth and Thalia, Fitzroy, Maren and myself all had a big cackle about my performance on the phone. Jana even came down herself with a red face either from laughter or from embarrassment for me. I wasn’t embarrassed myself or at least I wasn’t showing it but rather, I just went along with the boisterous moment.

From one moment to another I did travel, creating another Common Law Brief, grabbing cab charges from downstairs, chatting to people and then finally ending my day. However, the day did flow fairly quickly for me and I owe that to always having something to do at my job. Whether it be work or chatting to someone about work related topics, I’m always busy but in a laid back and comfortable attitude.

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After a delayed train home Tony rings Lyssa about the…