A Poem For Jewell And New Ticket Gates (Part 1)

Tired Of My Friends

For the second day in a row, humanity has depressed me more than it has upraised. The middle of the month is upon us and still, this month holds together weakly on the weekends. What becomes of these aging acquaintances of mine, who would rather themselves wither at home than exploring the sweet surroundings of clubs. Just like the little children they have learnt to be, none of them want to let go of mummy’s hand. Campbelltown really is a hole, too far from the city to be bothered and too close to monotony to care.

Please, faith, my one true companion, let these further days bring some glory to your name. Give riddance to such procrastinators that bring these pages such animus and propel forth the vibrancy of such new faces in my direction. These new threads and fashions weren’t bought so that I could stand in front of my mirror and wish that I was at a club. Most of my friends might be getting past their years of clubbing but I’m just beginning with such zest and have no one to my side with the same geniality.

If I was still friends with Johnnie, Miroslav, Naqi or even if I was still going out with Lyssa, my nights would be much better than to what they have succumbed to. Was my life a better one without this resisting magnet of acquaintances to my life. Who when I want to do one thing, tend to always disagree and do another. Who never have any planning skills or any such idea of what they want to do for fun. I ask myself, would I give away this bunch of loose-knit friends for any other association in my life, I think so…

Why I Keep Writing

Before I think to begin chronology let me just digress to the second attempt at poetry this month after such a long and dry season due to my overloaded hours and days. Back when I wasn’t working I used to think that I wouldn’t be able to handle working and then coming home to type for the rest of the night, thinking that there weren’t enough hours. Well, now I know it to be true and normal people would give up by now but, normality comes from these memoirs.

You can understand that I have grown accustomed, used to and even dependable upon these pages to keep my sanity and well being. My life without these pages to sustain thought and better my perception would be nothing more than a paradox of the glamorous entity here. I wouldn’t be able to give up even if I tried and if I lost my computer, I would find a way to start all over again or continue. Me without my memoirs is a crazed lunatic waiting to be sprung.

A Poem About Jewell

I crave for these hours to settle myself down as it is mostly the only source that will help me collaborate and then build upon myself. Anyway, from this digression I have to note that I wrote another poem today which isn’t anything special but it’s heading up that road and back to my glory days of lyrical content. Basically, the poem is about how I’ve felt that my ties with Jewell have continually decreased in mind as time has gone by. With time, my heart has learned not to forget, but to put aside.

It wasn’t until a couple of days ago when I thought that I never wrote of Jewell anymore that it hit me. Jewell might not receive the compliments and fond adoration that is written here from my true self which goes to compliment my poem. Basically, what was a savage hunger back in those days has now with each breath lost such interest in words. A once insatiable love is now whispered in passive winds until it will one day fall to silence, exhausted with discontinuance. Here now is the poetry and then we shall to chronology…

Time doth tame the most savage of hungers,

Longing hearts do with such thoughts lay unsung,

Condemn this heart from such murderous action,

That with each breath lost, lose insatiable love,

Passive winds, with silence unstrung,

What passive winds retain, undone.

New Ticket Gates At Campbelltown

Beginning now with the start of my workweek, let me just have a little go at Cityrail. Commencing from Monday, Campbelltown train station introduced the opening of their ticket gates. For the past couple of nights there have been a horde of badges from both the police officers and train inspectors, praying on everyone using the gates, feeding on our mistakes. I’d just like to note that this new technology has really gone to their heads and seriously, getting a $100 fine for alighting from a country train, that’s ridiculous.

These people need to wake up from their satisfaction of superiority because they’ve put too much on too soon. Monday morning was only my getting used to the new ticket gates in which there was a horde of badges. Tuesday was a warning day in which we received notices on our country trains noting that they will be giving out infringement notices to people who jumped off at Campbelltown.

Escaping such a burden on Tuesday I had no such luck on Wednesday as they showed no leniency on their cracking down. Today was just the same with their ferocity in bringing down what little respect they have and although I slipped away from another fine I was persuaded to catch a normal train home because I might get busted again. Idiots, I hate them all for adding such morose ingratitude to the surly events of my month.

Photos And Calla In The Kitchen

Monday morning after waking up at 6:00 a.m. and getting myself I caught my train to the City, had a little sleep and then jumped off with a couple of minutes before work officially began. The morning granted me satisfaction as I called up the bank to see if my money had come through. The anticipation was short lived as I jumped up and down in celebration, turning on the computer and planning how exactly I would spend my money.

Taking along the negatives for my recently developed film I dropped it off at the photo lab in Wynyard Station, eager to pick it up at the end of the day. In regards to my day at work I can’t remember anything because I didn’t write down any pointers but I do remember being kept inside for the day. In the morning when entering work with the mail I noticed Calla in the kitchen. Taking my time to get out my ID Card to open the door I was prolonging myself because I wanted to prepare myself to say hello.

In the end it was short and brisk but the both of us kept eye contact and as I headed around the corner we were still smiling and looking at each other. For each successive day I’ve had the chance to see Calla and today, man did she look hot. Not only did I find out she dresses up to head to nightclubs but taking a look at her while she was slightly bending over a table, she has the best ass I’ve seen. The greatest grooves, such shapely curves, she has the ass…

Filing With Najla

There is not much else to point out about the day apart from my sending out a brief in the morning and doing a horde of filing for David. The new brief lists were in full effect as Najla and I commenced afresh. The traumatic knowledge of Najla hating the filing wasn’t evident until Wednesday but slowly, as the urge was more persistent and her procrastination was more evident, I began flustered loathing. Today I was irate with Najla’s lack of priority but I did appease my thoughts when Najla finally got to some filing for Joselyn which was turning out to be larger than David’s filing.

Kelsey handed us some briefs to get completed and talk of our little meeting was beginning to escalate in chatter. My association with most people at work was kept low-key because it was a Monday but I did have a great conversation with Jonas when using the photocopier. For lunch I think I’ve already commented on my actions but I can’t be too sure as it was a rainy or getting to that point. This is what a long line of chronology does to you, it makes you forgetful, or is it just the mood I am in now…

Shawn Waits Outside Work

Heading to the train station at the end of the day with Najla I ended up spotting Shawn who was a couple of steps behind us as we headed down the escalator. Pointing avidly to Shawn and yelling out to him he had already noticed me and it wasn’t until he was alongside us that I found out he was waiting for me to finish work. “I waited out the front of your work for ages and when I didn’t see you come out I thought ‘Fuck it’ and started walking to the station” he commented.

Introducing him to Najla, we walked through the ticket gates and as I said goodbye to Najla Shawn and I headed to the platforms. Jumping into the first available train it did become a bit squashy as everyone like usual, was trying to cram on. Just as the doors were about to close I noticed Linh running in and as he spotted me he found his way over and we began talking candidly. Forgetting to introduce Shawn as he was behind me, I figured that Linh would have been oblivious to who he was.

As the train doors were fully shutting a lady got herself wedged halfway in and out of the carriage. It took my good will to free her by pulling one door open and as the other slid towards me I had Linh force the other door open. The lady obviously was grateful and I was pleased. Upon arriving at the next stop which was Town Hall, Linh said his farewells as he headed downstairs to find a seat and once at Central Station Shawn and I jumped off.

Blonde Girl On The Country Train

Heading to the country trains we walked into the first carriage and as usually happens, me and the blonde girl who is friends with half the carriage caught eyes. Each night I have caught this train the both of us share a look as I enter and as it is the same quick observing but shy look I yield, I figure she has a thing for me as well. Loathing the venture to the second carriage as there was a possibility Xavier might be there I decided it would be a benefit to stay in the first carriage.

Unable to find a seat next to each other I made it a plan to sit two seats behind the blonde girl on a three seater as Shawn sat across the isle on the two seater. For the rest of the trip at least until Glenfield Shawn and I continually chatted to each other, oblivious to the man that was reading his paper between the both of us. I’m sure the man was probably feeling like a big toe and wanting to change spots with me so I wouldn’t have to talk through him but Shawn and I didn’t care.

As the both of us talked on many subjects I was later told that there were two girls sitting behind me that were continually listening into our conversation. Asking if they looked decent Shawn told me they were alright and was happy about his discovery. “Each time you started talking they would look towards us and listen into our conversation, having a little laugh”. Unaware to what they looked like until the next day, I knew one of them from somewhere and they weren’t too good looking.