Winifred Calls and Madden Gets Buried (Part 2)

Waiting for Jewell to Ring

Swinging the subject purely to Jewell now, she still hasn’t called me but I know her all too well. You could see the strain in her will to say something that would unite us again when last we met but showing forbearance and reticent obstinacy she decided, like me, to allow words not to be said. Since that chance meeting I have hoped that it is Jewell on the other end of the phone when it rings but it never is.

I knew that the best chance would have been if she called me on the same night but now my faith has dimmed of her ever calling me again. In respect, I hope that Jewell was sitting by her phone and waiting for me to call her but that very thought had me hold back any tiny intent of doing so. I didn’t want to be the pushover that I was to Lyssa and I certainly didn’t want to call Jewell uninvited so I diverted my heart’s thoughts and held onto my patience.

Dreams of Jewell

These past few nights made me think upon my times with Jewell, play the CD’s and reminisce of old times. They also made me imagine the reality of what our life would have been if we were together. When I tried to think of Jewell in a sexual manner I couldn’t get past the purity of who she was. To me, the thought of being sexual with Jewell is very inviting but then it leans to the fact that I would ruin what I cherished, the purity, the chastity.

Therefore, it might sound strange from my own words but I would prefer to cherish my relationship with Jewell all the more if we had that bit of mystery. I respect Jewell too much to ask her to share her love in more intimate ways and I think her too pure and precious to consider ruining it all with sex. Rather, I love the idea of having her tease me mentally with her physical attraction. I would prefer to just sleep in the same bed with Jewell, wrapping myself around her soft and petite body, feeling the warmth of her hands around mine.

I would prefer for myself to involve myself in what lingerie Jewell buys, to take pleasure in watching her walk around in my seductive choice, only to watch my passion and appetite grow with each day. To sit under our fig tree, visit stage shows, travel to clubs together, be a couple. This I know can one day happen as I have already made my way into her heart but, what do I say to get into her arms…

Winifred Calls

Now as I end my discussions upon relationships I have some new and exciting news. A couple of minutes ago I received a call from a temping agency that I called on Friday for a Dictaphone/Typing position. A lady from that agency called Winifred just gave me a call and touched upon some questions regarding my prospects for that position. It turns out that I needed experience in Dictaphone which I already knew but she asked me to send in my résumé to her which I will soon do when I head to Campbelltown.

Just to think, in these hours I normally would have been half asleep but because I wake up earlier I sound sharp on the phone. The lady picked up on this and rang me back seconds later informing me that I had a very strong voice on the phone. She wanted to know if I was interested in working on some telephone marketing work as she was impressed but I told her that I wouldn’t be confident with a position.

Advising her of my background and lying about someone else offering me a telemarketing position (With confidence of course) she told me that there were many jobs available for me. Therefore, I will send my résumé to her and hope word-processing jobs come my way. And to think, just before she called I was saying to myself “I should compliment people in the employing field much more as that will have them remember me and in turn get me future employment”.

Now with this new information and my hands clenching up with RSI I must be off to Campbelltown. I have to fax in my résumé, look at prices for computer keyboards and visit the music shop to check out the ‘Britney Spears’ CD single which I will buy with my next payment. Just quickly, my biceps still hold a touch of pain in them from my strenuous workout on Thursday, I thought it would have gone by now. Tomorrow I will complete another workout and I will probably see myself heading to the temping agency on Wednesday for an interview if all goes well. For now, I must be off to Campbelltown…

What to Call This Book

Monday 9:35 p.m.

The hours are growing thin tonight and I feel the need to sleep early again. This new sleeping regimen is really taking effect and over the past week it has kicked in rather effectively. However, as my eyes do grow a little tired with my having eaten boiled chicken (The Tryptophan does it all the time) then I must to chronology first and forget philosophical remittance. Just before I start the common print, I have one thought in my mind.

I remember that when Shawn was over my house he kept stressing the use of my diary when he was losing a game by saying “Go, put that in your diary then”. If I should have been offended by his use of my diary or if I should have taken it on the chin like any other mocking comment I wasn’t too sure of. I believe my arrogant and stubborn nature cut short any talking of Lyssa or ridicule directed her way.

People knew that I would bite their head of if they said something bad and that just made them cautious to say anything at all. I don’t like sharing much of my personal things, especially sexual prowess and I guess that my diary goes hand in hand with my bid for obscurity. However, I do feel that people are mocking what I do in these pages when they demean it by using it in a jovial or mocking sense, as if it wasn’t a great deal.

With time I have been subjected to people calling this my diary and that isn’t too bad but the raillery has caused me to see ‘Diary’ as a childish and diminutive word for lack of better explanation. Therefore, I consider this not to be a diary but a deliberation of chronology, philosophy and poetry within a vastly expanding and improving package. Call this a diary if you wish but the words explode with much more meaning than puerile subjection.

Shawn Comes Over

Beginning now with my Friday, detail is a tad sketchy but as I do recall, I left my entry to either call Shawn or Keith. Something interesting had to be done for my first day of the month, something that wouldn’t leave me bored or alone for the whole day. Giving Keith a call first I found that he was working and knowing that he was headed up to Gosford where he would visit Club Troppo for Binh’s birthday he was out of the equation.

Calling Shawn next who initially would have been included in any plans (As Keith would have picked him up) I woke him up from his sleep as the time was just before midday. Asking him if he wanted to do anything for the day he released a yawn but sounded interested. Placing two options in the air I said “We could either call Ralf and see if he wants to go out or you could come over with your Playstation”. Shawn tended for the second option so I let Shawn get himself ready in which he had to dress, shower, eat, you know, the whole shebang.

An hour or two later Shawn rang me up informing me that he would be coming over very soon. At the time I had the music blasting in my room and it was still blasting when he opened my front door and made his way into my room. Sitting back and relaxing for a little while after switching off my computer I knew that it would be the last time I would be turning it off for a while.

Madden Fury

The game plan was hopefully for Shawn to head home early in the night so that I could get some sleep but it differentiated somewhat. Shawn brought Gran Turismo along with his as well as Madden 99 and Basketball. Firstly we began to play Gran Turismo where we raced against the computer consecutively in arcade mode so that we could acquire enough victories to race in more car classes.

When Shawn and I competed against each other on Gran Turismo I was happy to be winning my fair share of the races. This in turn lessened his confidence when we played Madden 99 but for the first two games I was whooped. Using my season team that I had created with Pat Madison I found him to be my main interception play. For the first game I was intercepted six times and I got to the point where I started feeling the burning desire to break the controller.

Burying the Game

In this mad tenacity I recited to Shawn the story of how I once burnt a computer game on my Amiga with chlorine and then buried it in my backyard. This was way before I started writing in my diary in the prehistoric days and around the time that Jett and myself used to travel to the markets to buy computer games at cheap prices.

However, this time around it was me and Imad who bought the game and I’m not too sure what the game was but I remember how much it pissed me off. In my mad rage I made my way to the backyard with a container of chlorine for the pool we used to have before we excavated it. The chlorine was only supposed to be for effect as I went to burn the CD but surprisingly I found that the chlorine was a great burning force and it quickly solidified and encased the floppy disk.

With the puffing fury still eminent I made my way to an already dug hole in the backyard garden, placed it in the hole and buried it with a little twig cross on top. I’m sure that it still has a chance of being in the backyard if my mum hasn’t already dug it up by plowing the dirt, then again, maybe it’s gone.