Interrogated About My Night (Part 4) – Mad Chaos: December 15, 1998

Left Off the Friday Guest List

Gathering that Lyssa was out with Penelope I could have been right as Lyssa called back at 6:00 p.m. Lyssa told me that Penelope and Ali had seen everyone up at Fun n Games on Friday night when no one bothered to call me. They were both looking to see if I was amidst everyone but I wasn’t to be found and Lyssa thought that was rude of my friends not to have invited me out but everyone else was.

That’s how I gathered that Lyssa had just been out with Penelope, new information. To my defense I told Lyssa that I didn’t feel like going out on Friday anyway otherwise I could have just picked up the phone and called one of them or I could have asked Ralf what he was doing when Min-Su rang me and handed the phone to him at his house.

On top of that Keith and a bunch of hopeful others probably thought I was having a night with Lyssa and didn’t want to bother the state they thought I was in so that’s enough defense to me. Lyssa has been very good about not including Ali and Penelope in conversation since that argument we’ve had and ever since then they have only been mentioned sparingly and no fights have ensued.

A Birthday Party Gone Sour

In our 6:00 p.m. conversation on Sunday night Lyssa went on to tell me about her brother’s 21st birthday party and how there was a video camera and a normal camera for the night. The sleazy guy from Lyssa’s family was there and as she would walk past him and the rest of them he would say rude and demeaning things towards her. Penelope didn’t like his attitude either and was disgusted but she too felt powerless to say anything. Lyssa invited Penelope to the party with her and starting around 4:00 p.m. Lyssa kept herself at the party until midnight.

From there Lyssa and Penelope headed to Chevy’s and she informed me that she was just so pissed off once she got there. Once she walked into the door she got a sleazy pinch on the butt and it was so hard she swore it was still bruised. Lyssa didn’t get to see the culprit but it was probably the same drunkard prick from later in the night. This drunkard walked right up to Lyssa’s face, so close she had to take a step back from his foul sleazy breath.

Asking if Lyssa was a model and then if she had a boyfriend Lyssa replied “Why, do you know him do you.” The drunk shouted out “Yeah, he’s standing right in front of you” to Lyssa and then grabbed her intensely on the ass with his hand gearing down to the underground. Lyssa pushed him off her and continued to walk away, he left her alone. Then there was a wog guy that tried chatting Lyssa up thinking of getting onto her but Penelope got him off her.

Dodging Questions About My Night

Lyssa left Chevy’s around 2:00 a.m. because she was so pissed off with the people inside. Lyssa then asked about my night and when I breezed past my night she wanted more detail. Not really wanting to get into detail I told Lyssa I’d prefer not to speak in detail about my night because I couldn’t be bothered.

Persistent was Lyssa wanting to hear about my night and all the more I wanted to keep it from her because that was the whole reason of her ringing me so early in the morning and then asking about my night as soon as she rang me. Sure it’s probably seen as a nice gesture but I know exactly what Lyssa wants to know and that’s if I met any girls for the night.

Lyssa must have thought that I got onto some girl that night by the way I was talking, maybe even having sex with her and she hung up the phone because I wouldn’t say a word. What would it be her business anyway, why get so angry about it, she’s not going out with me, I don’t have to tell her.

She Rings Straight Back

Within minutes Lyssa called me back and I knew she was eager to find out about my night, it was now killing her not to know the truth. Fearing the worst Lyssa went all quiet and she started to sob a little and when I asked her what was wrong she asked “Did you kiss anyone.” Telling her that I didn’t I asked “What if I did anyway, it’s not like you didn’t get onto Braxton or Pedro.”

Still in a somber state Lyssa mentioned “That’s different, this is you and I don’t think I can kiss you anymore if anyone else has kissed you because I still like you. That’s why I’ve been coming over every weekend, haven’t you noticed.” That was true, Lyssa has been coming over and we have been spending much more time together but still, if Lyssa liked me then our sexuality would also be healthier on my part. The time that Lyssa offered to give me oral sex because I was depressed would have been better if Lyssa didn’t flick mud upon her own dirtied concept and belief of oral sex.

Counting Our Differences

Lyssa’s always believed that giving oral to a guy is demeaning and feels like she is a hooker and doing it for the sake of making me feel better doesn’t help her frame of mind. Lyssa would only be giving me oral sex because she felt she had to, not because she felt love and wanted to. The point I’m trying to make is that Lyssa might be coming over more often but she’s not making much of a progress if she wants to like me more.

It’s not just sex but her attitude hasn’t changed at all. Lyssa and I are very different in the likes of many things. I like giving as much as I can in sex where Lyssa prefers to be timid and less dominating which frustrates me because I would have liked for Lyssa to be more spontaneous and just deal me a surprise when we were watching television or something.

Then there is our attitudes where I put Lyssa over my friends but she kept the bout between Ali and Penelope going for so long. Lyssa feels like she’s the princess or at least that’s what I think of her. If she can’t have her own way she’ll sulk, if we have an argument she’ll want to be on top of it. It’s always about me showing her affection rather than her showing the same to me.

If I don’t meet her in the City one day or abide by her late planning she’ll get upset not bothering to think the hurdles I have to jump just to meet her engagements. Lyssa asks too much of me, I don’t ask enough and I let Lyssa get away with plenty of things in our time together where I got away with none and had a large argument to show for it.

Not Ready for Round Two

If Lyssa likes me again now then that means that she would like to head back into what we now know as a void, a relationship. Yet, I don’t really want to head down that road with Lyssa again, not as yet anyway. Before I did but now I want to experience other people even though I’ve found it hard to find.

This wouldn’t be if Lyssa didn’t push me away so much, have so much arguments with me and showed so much transgression in the bedroom. With Lyssa informing me that she didn’t want to go down on me anymore now months ago was the start of a downturn and although I tried we couldn’t get it back on my terms.

Now that Lyssa likes me she wants to believe she has the power but I want someone who enjoys sex and giving in sex as much as I do. I’d like someone that I can write poetry to and they will appreciate it with utmost respect rather than ripping it up. I want someone that adores me and loves me as I will for them and have been known for it. Lyssa holds no more of those qualities, she has stripped them from me so what do I have to look forward to.

A Photo Nobody Developed

Finally I told Lyssa about my night and how it wasn’t that much at all. Lyssa sounded pleased and then informed me that she wanted to come over later in the night to hang with me. That sounded fine by me and as we had that in mind Lyssa told me that Nikita had a great picture of me and Lyssa together posing for the camera.

Informing me about the day it took place Lyssa told me that Nikita hadn’t developed these photo’s for at least a year. This was the day ages ago that Lyssa and I were in Campbelltown crossing the road to get to Pizza Hut on Queen Street when we noticed Nikita and that black girl who is also Lyssa’s friend driving the car (Can’t remember her name right now but it’s something like Odalys).

They jumped out of the car on what could have been a Sunday and I remember Nikita looked real good wearing red lipstick and some nice clothes on. She had a camera and with it she decided to take a picture of the both of us. After that they drove us and they were going to give us a lift but we were alright.

There was also a picture of the black girl who is rather chubby on the camera film. She was standing in the bathroom and then Nikita shouted out “Get ready” and opening the door she took a photo of her in the nude facing the camera. They are thinking of making the photo into a T-Shirt but I doubt that will happen. By now the black girl would have forgotten about the photo so they’re going to do something to embarrass her but as Lyssa informed me, she isn’t the type to hold a grudge.