A Dripping Tap And A Stopped Clock (Part 3) – Mad Chaos: November 18, 1998

Forrest Gump And Homework

Backing myself all the way to Sunday night with Lyssa I am now more able to write about that night but not as emotionally as I would have if it had been done earlier. Turning the television on after entering my room for the first time in the night the time was around 9:00 p.m. ‘Forest Gump’ was on television and as we started to watch that Lyssa informed me that her College assignment had to be completed. Taking out her work Lyssa and I both started reading out the questions and to both of us it was puzzling.

All Lyssa really had to do was answer the questions that were already in the book, the hard part was finding the legal answer in 40 pages. Lyssa and I were going good for a little while answering half the questions but as we delved further and further it began harder. “I’m not doing it, don’t worry, it’s too hard to find the answers” bellowed Lyssa and after making sure she wanted to stop we began watching ‘Forest Gump’ again.

Things Heat Up Then Stall

Both of us lay on my bed as we were watching ‘Forest Gump’ and knowing that Lyssa was on her period I done nothing much to instigate a sexual response. Even though I was pretty horny I held myself back and really, I just wanted to sleep next to Lyssa again for the night. There we lay watching the movie and as I was being playful with Lyssa I rolled her over to me while the commercial was on. Nothing much really happened until the movie started to end.

Not exactly sure on how we started getting onto each other all I remember about the beginning was that Lyssa placed her hand on me down there after she aroused it with her incessant movement. Lyssa wore her white nightie to my house, she had a tampon on with normal underwear. As Lyssa aroused me with her hand and sensuality I became aware that Lyssa wanted my attention so we started to kiss with passion.

That of course led to more and as my hand traveled down the length of Lyssa’s body to her thigh I moved slowly to where Lyssa felt the most pleasure. While Lyssa was lying on her back with her hand still firmly on me I started to please Lyssa as best I could for our night.

A Frustrating Standstill

Ten minutes into our night a debacle of events occurred. Lyssa kept moving my hand from slight angle to another slight angle because she wanted the most enjoyment from what I was giving but somehow (And without even noticing) my hand kept straying from its destination. Lyssa told me to stop after ten minutes and as I asked her and myself why we were stopping Lyssa told me it just wasn’t working for her, it wasn’t the same as the real thing. Lyssa took her hand away from my genitalia and that to me was depressing.

I didn’t want to be sexual with Lyssa for our night because I knew that we would probably stop and I wouldn’t get to go off. For a guy that’s hell, having to live with this huge eruption waiting to go off but it never does. Asking Lyssa if she could finish me off while we kept doing the same thing she flat out told me no and that pissed me off. When it comes to sex these days it’s all about what Lyssa wants, never about what I want anymore. Lyssa’s taking the fact that I’ve cheated to her head now and she knows she can get away with plenty when it comes to sexuality.

Cold Shower Thoughts

Setting up the bed for Lyssa I sat there watching television as I lay on the waterbed next to Lyssa who now had her eyes closed. Blankly staring at the television screen I knew that I wasn’t going to get any sympathy from Lyssa who knew that I was aching to release myself but chose not to apply herself. So much shit was going through my head but I knew that I couldn’t go through the night with this busting feeling within. For that reason I walked solemnly to the shower and grabbing myself a towel I knew I was in there for only one reason, to relieve some stress.

The water was hot on my burnt back that ached in agony, alike of my thoughts that also screamed out for compassion but never did receive. The water did relieve some built up stress but I knew that it would not alleviate my sensual problem. For that reason I thought to relieve myself in what way I knew only of, myself. That’s probably the first time that my lips have revealed my actions alone but I was such at a loss and so needing relief that I relieved my stress.

The Dripping Tap

Turning the knob of the tap directionally the water began to perish and all I was left with was a dispirited thoughts, somber to faith. The tap did drip if ever so slowly and did I then think upon Jewell as I picked myself up from a seated position and crouched my foot over the patch where the water began to drop. Turning the tap even more the water stopped dripping and to me that signaled my life as it was, no direction, no animation, no life. Where I am now is where I shall be for a while, stuck, unless I figure out how to turn that tap back on.

When that tap once again starts to drip it will only flood more and more the ground that it stomps upon until one day my life will be of rain in sunshine. Walking back into my room I noticed that my clock had stopped at 12:15 a.m. near the exact time I left for the shower. At 1:00 a.m. I reset the clock and my life.

Watching Her Sleep

Stepping back into my room masking my guilt I sat on the edge of the waterbed staring down upon Lyssa while she slept so peacefully. There as I looked at her closed eyes, her lips slightly open I lay my hand upon her cheek in a glorified way and began sending my love through that hand. Lyssa flinched a couple of times as my hand so tenderly touched a fond face, so beautiful to my eyes. With those thoughts coupled along with my experience within the shower I kept asking my thoughts where I would like to sleep.

Edging towards Lyssa I thought to leave her alone so she could get some good sleep without me rumbling around on the waterbed. Lyssa looked so calm upon my waterbed and as I lay on the floor I felt comfortable not sleeping next to Lyssa. Even though it would have been better for Lyssa to sleep next to me on the ground I just thought I also needed some space from her for the night for what I was forced to do.

For a couple of minutes I kept watching television but that novelty soon wore off and I too was sleeping just as Lyssa was. I’m sure my thoughts would have been labile (replaces lucrid a word I invented, in archives) as I thought of the whole night and it’s actions.

Monday Morning On The Waterbed

Monday morning I was woken up by Lyssa at 8:30 a.m. when the alarm was meant to ring. Lyssa asked me to wind the alarm up so that it would go off at 10:30 p.m. so I gathered Lyssa didn’t want to head to Campbelltown with me that much. I myself was also sleepy so I set the alarm and in the background I could hear Lyssa asking me onto the bed.

“Why did you sleep down there” Lyssa curiously asked me. “I figured that we wouldn’t be comfortable up there together so I slept down here” I answered. For another half an hour I slept on the ground and as the time came up to 9:30 a.m. Lyssa once again asked me onto the waterbed. This time I put my feelings aside even though I wasn’t angry at Lyssa and jumped up on the bed.

A Second Attempt

Noticing that I was troubled by last night Lyssa thought to place her hand discreetly near my hips just a fingers touch away. That of course aroused me and I figured that Lyssa was going to try something again on me, I know how she works. My hunch was right and as Lyssa touched me through my pants and began caressing and massaging that area I became aroused. Due to the fact that I had relieved my stress last night I wasn’t as horny this time around but my giving was no different to Lyssa’s.

When I jumped on the bed I wasn’t facing towards Lyssa because my back was sunburned and movement really hurt me. The other small part was that I wasn’t too happy facing Lyssa but I got over that. While Lyssa was stroking me I took out one of her breasts and began massaging so Lyssa too could reap some benefit. What I didn’t want was for Lyssa to make me go off and for her not to receive anything so that put me off somewhat.

Lyssa was there for a while but it wasn’t long enough to get me aroused to full projection, by a hand anyway. Lyssa’s hands started to ache and so she stopped and upsettingly said “I don’t turn you on anymore do I”. That wasn’t the case, I’m sure Lyssa wouldn’t go off if I kept squeezing her boobs for half an hour. There was no foreplay and not enough excitement to make me aroused enough.

Informing Lyssa that I would like to go between her boobs she rolled over in a huff and puff because she wasn’t good enough and for that nothing more happened. If I didn’t relieve myself last night I would have definitely been very agitated in the morning as Lyssa failed to make me go off twice. Rather she stopped short twice because she wasn’t confident in herself.

A Missed Chance On Monday

“I wish we could just have sex, why can’t we have clothes sex” Lyssa asked herself. Little did we know that Lyssa had stopped bleeding, only after one or two nights of having her periods. That was a bit amazing but Lyssa told me once she got home and checked that it was all over. That meant that Lyssa and I could have had sex on Monday morning but because we weren’t aware of that fact and Lyssa didn’t check herself nothing happened.

For the rest of our morning up until 11:00 a.m. we were arguing as to how Lyssa was getting home. I didn’t want to escort Lyssa to Campbelltown and then have her tell me to go home soon after because she was meeting with Penelope’s mum so that idea was out. Lyssa didn’t want to catch public transport by herself so she decided upon a Taxi. Well, it’s not my money it was hers and if she chooses to waste it on a Taxi let it happen.