Another Weekend Of Backlog
Another subjective day to the perils of burdensome backlog and as I keep speaking of this occurrence, will such a domineering repercussion ever subside over such a stereotypical inductor as work. There is many a day to speak of but none shall be more commanding than this weekend and in particular, the role of this morning. This weekend has been eventful but not to a desired expectation. Yeah, I did go out on Friday to Rogues but I could have had a better time and Tyler did come over last night along with Imad but again, it could have been a better night.
Today that role of indefinite stigmatism seems to be rolling on with my phone call from Lyssa some ten minutes ago. Before Lyssa’s call I had received several phone calls to which I woke up at 9:30 a.m. and began on my continuously interrupted memoirs. There should be no secret that I spent the first two hours putting the finishing touches to my last entry (Around seven pages worth) and my first interruption came from Jett at 10:00 a.m.
Jett Plans More Skirmish
Advising me that he was trying to put together another team for skirmish he asked if I was in and still recuperating from our last ordeal I agreed I would be in for it. Explaining how I’d arrived to the last stage of ‘Driver’ we chatted upon that for a touch and then discussed our plans for the day. When noting that I might be heading to the movies Jett exclaimed “Serious, that’s where I’m going today”. Putting together a plan to meet up with Jett later in the day at 1:00 p.m. he went off to call Shawn and I back to my memoirs.
Minutes later Shawn called me up fresh from my conversation with Jett and asking for his number I opened up the phone listing file on my computer and handed it over to him. Caring not to pry on his night, I figured that he would have headed to Carmen’s with Ralf. Advising that Jett would probably speak to him about skirmish, I let him get to calling Jett back and remembering that my hat was still in his car, I called back minutes later.
Explaining that he had taken the hat out of his car and placed it in his room, I also sought to ask him about skirmish to which he also agreed to go. From what I know, Jett has planned it for September or in a month’s time when there is a long weekend. From that phone call I gave Imad a call and to my surprise his mobile phone rang and he answered.
Sleeping in bed with some girl he mentioned that we would be heading to the movies as planned but he wanted to head out around 6:00 p.m. for the night. That ruined my plans of heading out together with Jett and Anders but figuring that I pledged to be with Imad, I’ll have to advise Jett that we’re not heading up with him.
No Call For Her Birthday
Lyssa was the next person to call me within those two hours of my debriefing with a rather callous greeting. “Thanks for calling me for my birthday” she sternly noted to which I didn’t really have too much defense against. I admit I was in the wrong tow which I should have forgotten about my anxious divergence and called Lyssa. Too many times when it comes to Lyssa, because of our uncertainties and her bitchy attitude, it’s hard to judge whether she would welcome my call or reject it.
Therefore, many times I take the timid road steering away from possible repercussions when in reality the repercussions come in greater length forwarding my questionable doubts. I figured that I would leave Lyssa alone for this whole weekend because she wouldn’t want me spoiling her weekend by having a call from me. On the same note, I didn’t want to hear Lyssa say “I have to go now” two seconds after I called her on a Friday or Saturday because she would be too busy in preparation for her birthday.
In a way, I should have just taken that chance and bade her a happy birthday but I kept to myself and in return, she was rather cold in our conversation. My excuses came too much too late, trying to explain to Lyssa that I was going to say goodbye to her when she was jumping off the train for work on Friday. I couldn’t really say much when Lyssa referred to Jewell in conversation saying “You sent Jewell a birthday card for her birthday but I don’t even get a phone call”.
That was hitting below the belt as I couldn’t really respond to that and as soon as Lyssa was through with her aggravated criticism she mentioned that she was going to hang up the phone. “Don’t do that” I asked trying to bring her weekend into play and apologizing for not calling, something I rarely do. Lyssa was only giving me short and stern answers to my questions to which I asked if she headed out on Friday night to which she replied “Yes”. “Where did you end up going” I asked to which her malevolence bid her answer “Out”.
A Life In Shambles
Lyssa just wasn’t releasing her frustration but she had all the reason to be angry at me. Trying to relieve some of that tension, I talked more about her weekend but still, she only told me minor details. Advising Lyssa that I was thinking of inviting her to the movies today (Which is true) she harshly uttered “No”. Figuring that she was just trying to get one back at me, from her words I soon realized she was heading out with her ‘fuck-wit of a dad’.
That at the time didn’t make too much sense apart from my knowledge of his drunken attitude but I’m sure when Lyssa is ready, she’ll advise me of her reasons to hate her father so much. When you take a step back and look at Lyssa’s life right now, it really is in shambles, created by all the woe around her. You have Naqi in the loony bin, Penelope carting around the woes of breaking up with him, Lyssa’s ill-respected dad, her longing for loving attention and not being able to receive it from me in what seemed to be a last attempt when she headed over my house.
Being turned down in her indirect bid to have sex would have been a telling blow and I see her buying this car, seeing a psychic and the obvious possibility of her wanting sex with me as a telltale sign that she’s reached her rock bottom and is trying to claw back out. I know because I reached that bottom not too long ago and in the same manner, I asked for Lyssa’s assistance, having her sleep over my house and hoping she could make it all better, make the despair all go away.
However, I’ve found my own way out and clawed myself back out into a different world. I know that Lyssa will do the same and I also know that she’ll thank me for not letting her demoralize herself by practically throwing herself at me. Yes, this might seem a touch haughty and self-absorbent but I believe it to be the truth.
Lyssa Chases A Charade
Speaking about her car for a couple of minutes, Lyssa told me how she hasn’t bought it yet, asking the dealer to fix a gearbox problem before she thought about giving her money away. “I’ve got four thousand dollars sitting at home just waiting to be spent” she explained to which I’ve had that feeling before, just with less money. Lyssa explained how she knocked the dealer down to $3,500 over the phone and when she went to see him days ago she uttered “So does the price still stand at $3,200”.
“You’re a tough cookie aren’t you” the dealer noted to which he didn’t give Lyssa a definite answer. So Lyssa is going to buy herself an 84 model Charade to which her dad is going to pay for her third party insurance. Soon Lyssa will have independence, driving her car to the station, hoping that it won’t get stolen and not worrying about the woes of catching a bus here and there.
Who Gets To Drive
In scold to the penitent words spoken so far, regarding the car, I do believe that Lyssa would have followed suit with her character if we were still going out together. If Lyssa is so hard on money and doesn’t even think of giving back money I ever lent her and holds no guilt when taking money off me, I do believe that she would never have offered me a drive of her car.
Although we were going out Lyssa probably would have kept saying “Go get a license first” to which if I ever did, driving her car would have been near impossible. This is just my opinion but having known Lyssa for so long and her attributes, I do believe she would stick to her misgivings when it came to letting me drive her car. The way I figure, Lyssa has paid too much money to share her car out but I am sliced by a double edged sword here as I do believe Lyssa would let her other friends drive the car.
Lyssa has always treated me different to her mainstream friends, lowly and as a humble servant compared to the crowns they wear. If Lyssa had a million dollars, she would share it with her friends apart from me and the same applies with her car. Lyssa would allow her friends to drive the car without her being there but when it comes to me, I would find it hard to temp Lyssa into handing me the keys to the car without some sort of argument or relentless struggle.
Back To Tuesday
Anyway, apart from this scorn on her will, our conversation ended suddenly after five minutes because Lyssa had to get ready to go out. With Jett calling me through these pages and being the only other person whose called thus far, I will begin upon my chronology for Tuesday and try to complete as much of an episode as I can before I have to head out tonight. Hopefully when I get back home I can comment some more on the weekend to which I hope that I can excel myself to at least Friday’s notation…
Diary Of A Mad Chaos is a daily diary written from March 1996 until today, of which individual books and book series have been created, namely “The Lost Years” an exploration of young, entwined love, the “Wubao In China (猎艳奇缘)” book series which provides an extensive comparative analysis of the cultural differences between Eastern and Western societies, and the book titled “Foreigner (华人)” an exploration of race relations in Australia.
