Women’s Shoes and a Foggy Train Window (Part 1)

A Good Start to July

Inroads to meeting new people and breaking new ground have been resplendent in this, the second day of the month. One would normally be optimistically cynical about my boastful pledges that each month starts off with great expectations, meets an impasse of events and then resolves either way. Last month began with those few days of glory which never really subsided giving way to a great ending month.

If it wasn’t for my lack of going out in successive weekends of last month I would have been honored to note that it was a great month but each perfection has its flaws. This month, like my optimistic reflections to its unfolding like a written story, my first two days have started out better than expected. You would already have gathered by Monday’s performance that I was obliged to be emphatic about my new friends met and new beginnings.

Tonight that flame stops not, it breathes with more fury to ignite what once was lost. I have been saying this throughout these last months with mysticism but I really feel that the old and more confident me is stepping out of the shadows and crawling slowly out of this thick skin. To say I do not will do not upon its saying, therefore, I speak my say in which this optimism breeds.

Saturday Plans With Shawn

The second day of this month brought more new beginnings, more undone happenings and greater faith for the future. Again, I love the forsythe received from working and I do name it regained confidence. Tonight I chose not to head out despite my not being offered. Despite this lack of planning and monotony on Keith’s behalf, my last two days have been fulfilling days due to work. Tomorrow will fare no different if Shawn and I head down to the City. Shawn started working last week in which he got paid tonight.

With the money he has still saved from selling his wrecked motorbike we’ll be heading to the City so he can spend luxuriously on club clothes. Hound Dog will be one of the visited shops along with all the places I had a chance to check out on Thursday and today. Tomorrow will be a big day of window shopping in which I will also get the chance to put a deposit on some club shoes. You’d figure that I would have learnt by my wrecking work shoes from ‘Politix’ not to spend large amounts of money on clothing but I can’t help it, I have expensive taste.

For example, I won’t get into too much detail but the club shoes I want to buy in which I valued them to cost $80 ended up being around the price range of $170. Tomorrow should be a big day as it has been cemented tonight by my conversation with Shawn. Therefore, let me get to chronology, have this night disembarked with depiction and prepare myself with sleep for the morrow’s big day in the City…

Rain at Town Hall

Heading back now to my depiction of Friday night, I am up to the portion of my tale where I decide to jump off the train at Town Hall in response to my curiosity for shopping. Behind me the doors narrowly missed my exiting body and as I calmly made my climb up Town Hall’s stairs I stepped out into the open to ponder. Gaping up with my lips lightly open, I noticed vividly the rain coming down onto the darkening City streets. It wasn’t pouring as yet but it had potential from a likely day that in the morning looked far from rain.

Deciding to make a break to the QVB I crossed the street and then began my voyage inside as to escape the drizzling rain. Aiming to head through the QSB and come out nearer to Pitt Street’s shopping complex I got caught up in the beauty of a shoe shop I could see downstairs. The name or location looked rather vague to me but knowing I was shopping around for shoes I couldn’t let the opportunity of finding a new location slip past my fingers.

Confusedly walking down the stairs of the QVB to the lower level I was immersed by a parade of fashion conscious shoppers, eager for the end of financial year sales. There were one or two shops with a line awaiting entry and one of them was Cobra in which I checked out at lunchtime. Cobra really wasn’t that interesting, no good shoes, nothing really special. Anyway, finally finding my way into the shopping portion of the lower floor I tried to locate the shop that I could just visibly see from upstairs.

Envying Women’s Shoes

Undefined as my memory was I walked past a woman’s shoe store and as I could see shoes in which was relatively what I wanted I started to get peeved. “Why do women get all the best fashion” I thought to myself like so many times before. Looking into the female only shop window at shoes I would have wanted my mind tried its best to break the barrier of gender.

The shoes almost looked unisex and I knew that if they looked good on me I probably would have bought them but then I have to put up with people like Keith speak their taunting gestures of how I wear women’s shoes. Even before I got my first paycheck I was fashion conscious but never had the opportunity to reveal myself. Most of the time when I see women wearing groovy pants to work with slight flares or great shoes I take notice.

I wonder to myself what fabric they are made of, if they have a stretch and then I wonder where I could buy the male equivalent to their taste. Like many shopping assistants said tonight, these days it doesn’t really matter if a shoe is men’s or women’s. If a guy likes what he sees he’ll most probably buy a pair for himself as there’s not much difference to distinguish with some shoes, same with women.

That made me somewhat less vulnerable to the thought of ridicule and now I don’t put off my desire to buy the shoes that best fit my imaginative taste. Tomorrow when I head out to the City I’m going to check out four or five stores in which I looked at club sneaker shoes. Only one of those shops had club sneakers made for men and there was a unisex shoe, the rest were made for women but really hard to tell apart.

I even looked at these hot shoes with fat soles, a bubble at the heel and a soft looking contour that runs up to just below the knees. This high boot has a zipper that runs the line of the fabric and it looks utterly amazing. For me, it would look great to wear but I’m not only worried about it being for women, I’m also concerned about the $300 price tag.

A Small Shop Called Wanted

For the half an hour I spent window shopping I visited a groovy shop on the bottom level of the QVB called ‘Wanted’. This I feel was the shoe store that I could see from atop and when I made my way in for a browse I stayed there for twenty minutes. Having a chat to the lady assistant about what shoes I was looking for she showed me a couple of different designs. As we pointed out a woman’s club shoe she was the second of the night to note that the gender label of a certain shoe doesn’t necessarily have significance or downplay on who should wear it.

This shoe store was amazingly stocked as I tried on a pair of leather shoes that were closely resembling the ones I bought from ‘Politix’, quickly wearing away. They were also a mint if I wanted to purchase them and it seemed that all shoes in this classy but small store were worth a fair penny. As I tried on some groovy looking men’s club sneakers I particularly liked the Velcro strapping unit. I didn’t want a club shoe resembling normal sneakers with shoe laces, I wanted Velcro for that extra groovy look.

What’s more, it was in the shape of an ink print of a butterfly wing or three fat fingers and as I put one on it looked great. Trying on a set of club shoes designed for women I loved the black and white contrast. To tell you the truth, the reason I got this idea to buy club sneakers was because I’ve always wanted to look a certain groove but I got the inspiration from a Playstation game. I’m not too sure of the name but you basically have to dance around to different beats, a mad game.

One of the guys who was dressed up to kill had shoes made of pixels but ones I still as much enjoyed. Now I want to find the reality of those shoes and if it takes buying women’s shoes to equal the satisfaction, I will. I’m not too sure what those shoes look like as I haven’t played the game since Jett came over last but from memory, I’ll try…

Hunting for Shooter Glasses

Apart from looking around for shoes I checked out one or two glass huts in search of the all important perfect spectacles. The type of glasses which have blue tinged frames more rightly known as shooters glasses. They are widely used now as fashion accessories at a nightclub or just if you want to look new aged and sophisticated. I want myself a pair because it will change my image somewhat more to who I want to be.

Clothes make the man, glasses accessories the man and together, they clench envy and intrigue within other minds. Alas, I couldn’t even find glasses that I could try on which is proving now to be a hard task, finding the right spectacles. With my shopping in the QVB complete after half an hour I grabbed a card from ‘Wanted’ in the event that it would lapse from my memory come Saturday.

Standing on the Train Home

My plan for Thursday night late shopping was to then head for Pitt Street but as the rain had picked up to an intense whirl of whipping droplets I attracted the attention of the turntables. Heading home around 6:00 p.m. the train was packed in which I had to stand for most of the trip back home. Trying my best not to look as if I was invading people’s comfort zone by eagerly glancing I kept my eyes averted to inert objects.

Having enough time to glance around the train a couple of times I noticed only one girl of reveled value. From where I was standing, she was in the seats where I was leaning up against, closest to the window. Having blonde hair and looking around my age, I thought it would be a boon to my credited day if I was to find a seat next to her. Low and behold, when we arrived to Padstow the seat next to her vacated and feeling no more sudden an urge, I plunked myself down eagerly but unwittingly to her eye.

Still with her eyes closed and relatively asleep she woke up minutes later and for the rest of the trip back home she didn’t drift back off. I rather enjoyed sitting next to her but I also enjoyed the turn in my confidence. Normally I would just gain enough raw nerve to sit next to a beautiful woman, contemplating for the rest of the trip whether I should say something or not. Usually I am plagued by the constant questioning of what to say and how to hold conversation but these days those are void from my wizening mind.

A Foggy Window Hello

When I did approach her with words it wasn’t as dramatic as what I would have liked it to be but for my confidence on later encounters it proved worthy. Just think, in a couple of years time I’ll look back on my days lacking any sort of confidence, laugh and wonder how I never used what I had to get what I want. Anyway, as we approached Glenfield I politely asked the girl next to me if I could wipe down the foggy window so I could see where we were.

Of course she wouldn’t say no and that gave me a chance to look her in the eyes as I asked a question and also to build upon our first words if ever I gained the courage. There had been a tiny pinprick in the frameworks of a lasting conversation but I never poked my intrigued finger far enough to reach such depths. The girl jumped off at Leumeah, quickly becoming renowned in my mind for being a breeding pool for beauty.

That promising boost of self-confidence did create a vibe that still looms in me today. Hope for future meetings is also breathing less vulnerably as I am doing what I always wanted to do, just approach people. Basically, if you talk to someone, you will most definitely hold a conversation and make a friend. As is in my cases, I tend to make more of an impact in laid back conversation with guys than women.

This is because more burden is weighed in talking to a woman because lets face it, women only speak to you candidly if they hold an interest for you, same with men. Men are just easier to talk with because there’s no expectancy or lustful tendencies blocking the vibes of conversation. That’s probably why Hamish from Subway thought I was gay, because I could be myself in front of him despite hardly knowing him.