Ralf Grills the New Girl (Part 6) – Mad Chaos: March 8, 1999

How Old Is Linnea

The gathering at the side porch was growing in number and as Linnea was out the front Tyler asked Tamsen how old she was as she walked in. None of us believed that she was 18 years old considering her height and age appearance and because Tyler was so curious and Ralf was so interested he blurted out “Well, bring her on out here so we can sit her down and ask her ourselves”. Tamsen took it upon herself to seek out Linnea as she walked through the party room to the toilet and as she did she plucked her out and brought her to the porch area where most waited with baited breath.

Ralf Plays Romeo

Seeming rather shy and cautious as she came outside Ralf acted the inquisitive Romeo and asked her to take a seat so that we can all be discerning of her. With a group of us lining the wall with chairs she was forced to sit facing all of us, in the middle of the porch area, facing everyone.

As if this wouldn’t have been embarrassing enough Ralf starting asking her about her age which she admitted she was eighteen but then he just blabbed on about shit. Feeling sorry for her as she sat there with her black dress-skirt that showed off a deal of her beautiful legs to the adoring crowd I had to endure the same pain she was, hearing Ralf blabbing on.

Tamsen told Ralf that he should go for Linnea despite her going out with someone because he cheats on her anyway and I guess with that he thought he had a confident chance. Stupid questions and things Ralf talked about was trash like “You know, I bought a knife off you at Hardware House about a year ago, remember that”. Everyone agreed that Ralf’s mouth was the entity of women’s relinquishment upon him and that their appraisal shall see none but a babbling buffoon.

Helping Her Escape

Explaining that she finished year 12 at St. Pats this year just past I asked her if she knew a girl called Lyssa, she heard of her. Somehow one and one didn’t go together and I failed to believe that she was telling the truth about her age based on what I could see and not interpret.

Something in her story didn’t click but if Tamsen, Keith and Linnea all say she’s 18 well then maybe she is. No one apart from Ralf had much to say to her and that was because Ralf’s babbling wouldn’t let anyone else get a word in edgewise. Tyler only asked her what her age was and that’s all he could do before Ralf took over but while Ralf was talking I devised a plan to get her out of all those glaring eyes and back into comfort.

Thus, while Ralf was talking I asked her where her friend was and as she told me she was still at the front I asked her “Wouldn’t you rather be there right now”. Through Ralf’s conversation I constantly gave her hints to leave and tried helping her but after a couple of minutes she stood up and said “Is it alright if I go to the toilet”. That I knew was her way to retreat from the bloodhounds that were trying to learn more of her mind and drool over her body.

Photos in the Front Yard

Heading for the toilet she never did return and I was thankful that the vultures would not pick at her anymore. Seizing upon this opportunity I walked over to the front yard where she ended up sitting with her lady friend and Tamsen after heading off to the toilet. Shawn also accompanied me as he had the same idea as me, to check her out but not bother her like Ralf.

Sitting down near the three of them I noticed that Linnea had been sitting down with her legs bent and I knew that if she spaced them somewhat like she had been doing all night I would not be disappointed. Dying to know what was under her black dress I opted to take a picture of the three of them. Linnea’s friend held her head down in the photo and I wanted to get a picture with all three looking up. Luckily for me the flash didn’t work on the first photo and acting naïve I waited until the flash came back on to surprise them.

“Hang on, the flash didn’t work” I noted and as she looked up and I was looking through the camera view I took a picture once again of the three of them. This would be a good time to note that Tamsen was wearing something that made her look pretty decent. With a red skirt on and a black top she looked dressed up and pretty and even though you could see she wasn’t wearing a G-String but just normal underwear it was still appealing. Speaking of underwear, Tamsen got a present off one of the guys with Linnea that was a G-String and white bra and from what I heard, it was her first G-String.

A Phone Call and a Departure

Linnea jumped on her mobile phone that started ringing soon enough and as she talked on the phone and I was standing up pretending to be neglectful I could see very clearly the underwear she was wearing. She might look 23 years old but she definitely is 18 when wearing underwear.

It was obvious she was going for the comfort factor rather than the impressive silks but she was wearing white cotton panties with little blue flowers on them. They were the sort of panties younger women would buy and knowing what’s on the market these days as I have modeled them on Lyssa on occasions I knew her underwear was a tad on the pubescent side.

If my camera hadn’t have wound up for its last picture I would have taken another photo but alas, it had finished. My original plan was to take a group photo of everyone so that I could have Linnea in the photos but it turned out better than expected, a closer one of her. The person on the phone was her boyfriend and within minutes she left by herself in her car to meet up with him. Hmmm, was it staged because of the vultures or not…

Presents and Birthday Cake

Upon Linnea’s departure we all made ourselves back into the party room but as there was a gathering happening once again in the side porch area I decided to be the person to gather everyone there. Before I note this let me just remind my memoirs about Tamsen’s unwrapping everyone’s gifts. This was taking place just after Tamsen handed out our little staged presents and as it was happening Min-Su took a photo of Tamsen with each present.

I thought this was pretty lame but it might turn out to be something memorable, holding up things. Much later in the night we sung happy birthday to Tamsen as she cut the cake. At this time Keith gave me the small zooming camera and having great fun with it I took pictures of Tamsen cutting the cake and the rest of the shebang. When the cake was cut I took a photo of Jett with Min-Su and then of the two couples and pictures of most of our group together. It all seemed like a big charade to me how Tamsen was doing such traditional and sometimes lame things but hey, that’s just a layman’s opinion.

A Circle of Chairs

Whilst in the side porch area I invited the couples and Callum to sit amongst the rest of us as we were all having a discussion. They did just that and letting them in we created a big circle of chairs. Min-Su was sitting on Jett’s lap and for a little while I sat on Tatton’s lap for a lack of chairs but I soon remedied that problem.

Callum was sitting on Noah’s lap as he was the recipient of Callum’s gay antics and receiving them without complaint. Callum sat on his lap then hugged him and for the rest of the time outside he was Noah’s boy. Tyler was also sitting next to the both of them and he was told that it runs in the family which made Tyler weary of Callum. Soon the couple had to leave to get home and I’m not sure where the girl that came with Linnea disappeared to but she had also gone. Now it was our group of friends and acquaintances left, oh and of course Callum.

Callum Teases Noah

Noah was the major tease for Callum’s playful gay attitude and he was also the one that allowed the most foolery to happen. At one stage Callum started talking about penis size and he went to unzip Noah’s pants. What surprised me was that Noah didn’t hesitate and allowed Callum to try and unzip the zipper.

Eventually Noah said “You can’t tell big it is unless it’s large” and with that Callum stopped. Tyler was also a target for Callum’s antics but that was more when Noah left. Tatton was just an easy target for Callum to pounce upon and between the three of them, Callum gave them back rubs, massages and acted out his little play on words. Tatton kept calling Callum ‘Penelope’ because he was the queen of Tamsen’s party, Callum took no offence it nor should he.