The time was 8:00 p.m. when I decided to call Lyssa just after my conversation with Shawn. Lyssa was doing an assignment for College but she dropped that to talk to me. Asking how Lyssa’s day at the beach was I told her that I had seen her coming home. Lyssa told me that she didn’t go down with Kieran after all. Kieran was at the beach with Pedro and his friends but Lyssa didn’t end up seeing them down there. Lyssa asked about my night and I tried not to make it sound too great like I was bragging. Lyssa asked if I met any girls and I just casually told her about the girl that danced with Ralf and I, not too much detail though.
Lyssa was telling me of her day at the beach and she started telling me a story about Ali and her. From what I had heard Ali asked Lyssa for a hug for squirting her with the water pistol and after that ice came into the story. Not wanting to know Lyssa’s funny story of Ali with ice (Knowing he probably put it down her back) I thought that this didn’t need to be told so I asked Lyssa not to say anything. Lyssa got angry with me saying I was being immature in not letting my hatred against Ali go. The truth of the matter is that I still hate Ali and I’m sure Lyssa wouldn’t want to hear me speak of how Tamsen spanked me on the butt and then gave me a wet willie on the ear. Lyssa would despise those comments for the rest of her inbred life so she should understand why I don’t want to hear about Ali the person I hate doing lustful things to the person I still hold love for.
Our first conversation ended because we were angry with each other. Lyssa told me she had to finish her College work and she would call me back later in the night. In that conversation I wanted to ask Lyssa over to my house to see if she wanted to sleep over but I thought that would be too bold of a question to ask. Lyssa called a second time just before Shawn came over and in this conversation she asked if I would come over and sleep at her house for the night. As inviting as that sounded I told her I didn’t want to. My reasons were simple, I wouldn’t be comfortable sleeping at her house with her mum there and getting there late in the night. What I explained later to Lyssa is that I don’t want her mum looking at me in the same light as she does with Carleigh. Lyssa’s mum hates Carleigh because she kept coming back into Kuper’s life and fucking him up but Lyssa assured me it wasn’t the same with mummy’s little girl.
Lyssa got angry because I wouldn’t go over to her house despite my reasons and asking if Lyssa wanted to come to my house she told me she couldn’t. Lyssa’s mum wouldn’t drive her to my house let alone anywhere at that time of night. Lyssa obviously didn’t want to get sexual because her mum would be over her house. Instead Lyssa just wanted my company.
Shawn’s car alarm beeped out the front and telling Lyssa I would ring her in a couple of minutes she sounded depressed but hung up. Walking in Shawn gave me my wallet and was set to head back home but I invited him into my house. If this was a good idea for the next two calls I’m not sure but not even a minute into his stay the phone rang. Halting our conversation about our visit to the beach on Monday I was surprised that Imad had called me. Imad was apologizing for not coming over on Saturday, I can’t even remember when we made those plans. The phone beeped the call waiting and answering it I knew it would be Lyssa. Lyssa told me to ask Shawn to drive me to her house but I kept telling her no on the phone. Lyssa once again got upset and I told her I would ring her back soon. Getting Imad back on the phone he had to serve a customer and in that time I let Shawn out of my house so he could get on his way home. Jumping back on the phone Imad told me he was busy again with customers and he had to go but he would visit me tomorrow afternoon.
Calling Lyssa back the conversation was based around me or her coming over each other’s house. Lyssa kept asking me to come over and I kept asking her to come over and we didn’t come to an agreement. Lyssa was calling me names and I called her an idiot because I became pissed off with her insults. Lyssa immediately hung up the phone and I kept on line hoping she would pick up but she didn’t and the phone disconnected after a minute. Calling Lyssa back we kept talking about someone coming over. Near the end of the night I was almost persuaded into walking over Lyssa’s house and catching a train on the condition that Lyssa went for a walk with me. My filthy mind was thinking that we could get some jiggy going on but Lyssa told me it was too dangerous for a walk. Asking if I could hug her Lyssa said yes and then asking if I could kiss her on the cheek she said yes. Asking if I could sleep in her room instead of the lounge room, she said yes we can sneak in. Asking Lyssa if I could kiss her on the lips she said, “What kind of a question is that” and didn’t want to answer it.
It was getting late and the time was almost 11:00 p.m. In this whole conversation I realized one important factor about virgin girlfriends. Despite the cliché where your first is always the hardest to get rid of and is always clingy, I have to say that this saying has some significance to my next line. Lyssa has held on to me like no other girl has and don’t get me wrong, I have been doing the same thing. In a way, Lyssa and I are both being clingy, we don’t want to let each other slip too far away. Too far away means getting attached, getting boyfriends or girlfriends quicker, being more choosy. That could be a good thing of course but I have a feeling that Lyssa will be in my life for a long time from now as a result of the both of us being clingy.
Lyssa told me a little while ago that after me and her make love she always feels like she hasn’t done enough. Lyssa will walk away and she will feel like she could have and should have done more. Well, she is right, Lyssa can do a lot more otherwise I wouldn’t be saying so in my Diary. Lyssa probably said that because I didn’t get to come last she was over my house. Instead, Lyssa had her orgasm and when she rolled over to enjoy the feeling and sensations she became aware of how tired she was and didn’t even bother finishing me off. Lyssa has the tendency to do this a lot and she started to complain about the most prized and sought after sexual act that a woman can willingly give, oral stimulation. Lyssa was great at giving it and when she started getting stingy near the end I started getting angry and blamed myself. So, Lyssa is right to think that she doesn’t do enough in bed and I’m only speaking the truth here. The only real time I can remember Lyssa going off (Apart from all the other dates we hired a hotel room and a selective few more) was the very last time we rented a hotel room. Lyssa and I broke up, it was a month and because Lyssa wanted to get back with me still she done everything to please me and I was satisfied. The only thing Lyssa didn’t do was keep going down on me during oral stimulation after I had gone off but I was definitely elated and pleased that night.
Lyssa gave me one last call at midnight while I was writing in my Diary tonight. Lyssa asked one more time if I would come over and then she tried to tell me that the reason I wasn’t coming over was that I wasn’t going to get anything from Lyssa. Lyssa isn’t right about that, I was going to go over her house anyway but I would have liked for that to happen in the night. After all, I wouldn’t have been thinking of taking a walk with Lyssa and bonking her in the bushes somewhere. Lyssa has always had this fascination of giving me oral stimulation on someone’s front lawn, I would have liked to have that tonight, definitely. Lyssa then explained she wouldn’t be able to have sex with me until her period came because it was too risky. The reason Lyssa had sex with me last week was that it was in the first couple of days after her period, the safest time if anything was to happen. That gladdens me knowing that some of me could have gone in Lyssa. Lyssa told me that there was a possibility that we will have sex after her period but I think it could happen next weekend, this coming Sunday. Lyssa hung up the phone ready to get to sleep and hanging up my end I continued with my Diary entry. So there you go my whole two days worth of Diary entry and all in just under five hours. The time is 4:50 a.m. and I have only one more thing to say in the next paragraph…
I’m already famous, I have the Diary, the Chronology and the Autobiography right here. The future will bring out my name and herald my days now as important to my becoming as a star. My money is being made now with my Diary and carved on stone already shall be my name. My true potential is within, I’m already famous, I just have to let everyone else realize it now.
Diary Of A Mad Chaos is a daily diary written from March 1996 until today, of which individual books and book series have been created, namely “The Lost Years” an exploration of young, entwined love, the “Wubao In China (猎艳奇缘)” book series which provides an extensive comparative analysis of the cultural differences between Eastern and Western societies, and the book titled “Foreigner (华人)” an exploration of race relations in Australia.
