Autumn Withering Lets Up
The withering of Autumn’s lesser embers have turned casually to a more notable quenching. With the poem I had created about the change from a lesser Autumn to a better Autumn withering these last couple of days after the moment have been as undistinguishable as how I am feeling mentally. There are moments where poetry seems to flow in my veins and then there are moments of severe writer’s block and envy of a mind that once was. The new Autumn in context symbolizes the relinquishment of unfavorable withering such as losing energy in training, losing my money and bills up to my neck has given way to the withering of unfavorable withering.
In short, what once was deemed bad and deterring is now ceasing like the dying embers and in its place is bestowed the sprouts of life from deceased bad luck. Just some of the good luck that has come my way since that pouring of rain had seen me change my views on Autumn’s withering is my being called today for an interview with a temping agency. There are other factors that note the contrast that I now see in withering but they will be told in due time.
A Temping Agency Rings Back
One of the temping agencies from the City that I favored called ‘IPA’ had called me back early in the morning for Monday. Luckily for me I had gotten to sleep earlier that night like I had said so I wasn’t too groggy for my conversation, actually I was quite resourceful. However, my trying to get to sleep at 3:00 a.m. failed as I had the same problem of trying to get to sleep, thoughts were in my head.
This has been explained in my last entry but I finally got myself to sleep around 5:00 a.m. The phone call on early Monday came to me at 11:30 a.m. and being half awake already I answered the phone with some expression to my voice. The lady I was chatting to told me that she had perused over my resume and after learning my typing speed she told me I was a shoe in for bank jobs.
Sydney, Parramatta and Ashfield were the places where they had jobs available for me and to me those three places were music to my ears, the least being Ashfield. However, we booked an appointment for Wednesday at 11:30 a.m. and considering I’m trying to get to sleep earlier these nights I feel that a 9:00 a.m. start on Wednesday is not out of the question. Tonight I expect to get to sleep as soon as I finish this Diary entry off so I can prepare myself for Wednesday and future job prospects.
Booking a Motel for Friday
Getting myself back to sleep I woke up around 1:00 p.m. but that to me is a sign of improvement. Once awake I received a call from Lyssa as I was still coming to. The point of our conversation wasn’t clear at first but building up a basis of topic we came to talk of our Friday night at a hotel. With that Lyssa asked me to ring up and book ourselves a room and hanging up with Lyssa I done just that.
The motel where we will be staying at is Motel Formule One in Leumeah and making arrangements I called Lyssa back. Knowing that I have no money Lyssa told me she would pay with a tinge of resent for my poor status. Conversation then started about our night as Lyssa told me she wanted to head off to dinner before we arrived at our room.
If that is bound to happen I’m not sure but to curb her spending Lyssa said to me “I’m not going to buy any clothes this week”. That to me just said that Lyssa had listened to my complaint of her always buying clothes each week when we were arguing about her getting out a loan. On Friday night Lyssa is heading out to a club out on the beachside in the City (Can’t remember the name) but it spun me out when she uttered “I have to save around $100 for the City on Saturday”.
Trying to work out exactly what Lyssa would spend her money on it worked out that $40 would go to alcohol, train fare, entry fee and then a taxi ride home because Lyssa is too fearful when it comes to catching a train or bus.
Nearing the end of our conversation Lyssa asked me a favor and putting on her voice she pleaded “Will you tape the Oscars for me tonight”. That didn’t ring any rejecting bells in my head so I agreed to spending four hours of my night to tape it for her, I had nothing to do anyway…
My conversation with Lyssa ended when she told me how she got $5 off a $30 towing fee for Penelope’s car by sweet talking her way into their lustful minds. With our conversation finished I had myself something to eat and then watched television for the remainder of the day that I had to wait to get to the Gym.
Overdressed at the Gym
When 5:15 p.m. finally arrived I put on my newer black cargo pants with my black bonds top and headed to the Gym. The reason I had done this was because I had become wary (For lack of a better word because of this fucking writer’s block that I have, I can’t think straight) that everyone was noticing my browned pants that I continually wore.
However, walking into the Gym I noticed most people as usual were wearing raggedy old clothes and most that I had known had the same shit on each time I had seen them. I was just being paranoid (There’s the word I should have used) feeling a little overdressed now. My workout lacked today and I feel that a call for lighter weights and longer sets is in hand until I can work through this. Maybe I should do what all others do and head to another Gym for one day. Anyway, here is my Gym workout…
A Lousy Chest Day
Chest: Beginning with my two minute warm-up on the bikes I moved to complete four sets of warming up for the Chest. For some reason I was rather angry in my appearance and of all the people that I talked to I must have sounded rude or as if I didn’t want to talk. Jaromir, Maddox, Jett, Redd, Kobi, Shawn and Pepsi were all seen but hardly talked to as I walked past them without as much as a glancing word.
Adding to this my lack of energy to push out heavy weights or even try I lowered my Bench Press to 160 pounds to begin with and even with this lowered weight I only completed 8 reps by myself. Heading to Peck Deck Fly’s with 180 pounds I pushed out a gutsy effort of 12 reps. Incline Dumbbell Press was next but with 60 pounds for each hand I only pushed out 3 reps, hardly anything.
Dips was my next effort where I pushed out 11 reps and then dropped. Peck Deck Fly’s was once again my target and with 170 pounds I pushed out 10 reps. Pullovers was now my next strength and with 70 pounds I pulled it up for 12 reps. From there I moved to Machine Seated Bench Press and dropping my weight to 160 pounds I found once again to only complete 8 reps. Cable Crossovers was next and last where I done 10 reps standing and bent over in two sets of 60 pounds.
Biceps: Some satisfaction came my way when Biceps faired a little better but not much. Beginning with Preacher Cable Curls and a close grip I didn’t have much problem forking out 11 reps. Moving to Alternate Dumbbell Curls from a seated position and 40 pounders I pushed out 6 reps and then a further two after a pause. Seeming this was a heavy weight for my time I moved to Preacher Dumbbell Curls and with 35 pounders I completed what seemed to be 10 reps. Last was my go at Concentration curls and after completing 5 reps with 35 pounds I dropped to 30 pounds and finished off another five.
Abdominals: Salvation come a little more with my abdominals but I have noted that since I have used the squeezing technique reps have been getting harder with each week. Steady on 60 pounds throughout I completed 90 reps in four sets. The first being 30 reps then 20 reps, 15 reps, 15 reps and a final 10 reps.
A Blonde and a Glance
The sweat was dripping profusely now and as I finished I cared not to say goodbye to anyone. On the way out I noticed that blonde that I find attractive and had noticed about two weeks ago. She was wearing shorts and she was with her friend who was also attractive. Back then I caught her glancing at me and for the first time our eyes had met but it was weird to read her eyes.
Either she was looking at me as a serial killer that had his go with her sister or she liked me but just didn’t know where to look or how to hide her reaction when I looked at her. Passing her on the way out I noticed her glance over and then quickly look away when I did glance her and I just thought this was her sign of showing some interest. Despite this glance between the both of us there was nothing in it and I left for home.
On the way home I bumped into the lady just across from the school who used to be the crossing lady. Standing there for fifteen minutes we chatted about her son, her teaching at Bradbury and my being poetic. Finally I let her get back to cleaning the car but I didn’t mind chatting with her.
Simon Knocks During the Oscars
Having something to eat once I got home it came to be 7:30 p.m. and I started to tape the Oscars for Lyssa. Within an hour I heard a knock on my window and as I had the stereo connected to the television I couldn’t make out who it was. Answering the front door it turned out to be Simon but wanting to tape the Oscars and knowing that playing cards at ‘Subway’ had seen its early grave I denied my going out with him and Keith.
Leaving empty handed he did manage to but in a question asking me if Shawn liked playing Shane Warne Cricket the other night. That struck me as peculiar and it sounded to me as if he was trying to be nosey about Shawn’s Play Station hoping that I would reveal something that would connect him to what had taken place in the past. However, I didn’t say much to it trying to figure out what would possess his provoked question, curiosity maybe.
Planning Friday Night
Near 9:30 p.m. Lyssa gave me a call while I was eating and watching the Oscars so I asked her to call me back in ten minutes. When she did we chatted about what had taken place thus far in the Oscars and then quickly onto our Friday night. There was not much extra said about it and I cowered in asking Lyssa anything to do with oral sex on my behalf because I knew what kind of answer I would receive.
Let me just hope that Lyssa finds herself helping out my long awaited want which is quickly turning into a near-need. Discussing lingerie for Lyssa to wear I suggested that she wear just the small blue G-string without a bra, she agreed to that.
This came out of haste because I couldn’t think of that much lingerie on the spot and it does come for easy action but I feel it will need to be changed before Friday night is upon us. Our conversation ended at 10:00 p.m. because Lyssa had to get herself to sleep but I kept taping Lyssa’s Oscars and now I am typing in here.
Swapping a Movie in the City
Completely onto a different subject now let me speak of something more personal but on the same topic of sex. Looking back in my Diary and tracking my first buying of a XXX movie to be back in March and my need to buy another one has seen me realize that my getting bored with certain scenes takes me on average, three months.
This is the first you will be hearing of this but tomorrow I am hopeful to wake up and head to the City early so I can exchange one of my movies for another, cheaper on my pocket. The movie will curtail to my obsession of sexual activity and if you are an avid reader of this Diary you will know it will be a movie of oral sex. My first buying a pornographic movie came out of curiosity to see what I was missing out on and as it turns out, I was missing out on a fair deal.
The second and third movie I purchased were due to me being out of a relationship and without sex so you can imagine what a trance imbedded in my brain will do to me. So when I wake up I am off to the City where I have already phoned up and seen what movie I will be getting, fear not, I don’t…
One More Poem Before Bed
Before heading off tonight and as it is almost 4:00 a.m. I will just include a poem I had written in the early hours of the preceeding morning. Once again it does have a repetitive and almost mechanical feel to it but I shall include it here as art is art and poetry is therefore poetry. Critically speaking I would have to be harsh upon it but it does have its moments. In this mental awareness I have (Or rather, have a lack of) I can’t be one to make good judgements so I will print it and be off an’t please you.
I hold in my hand such an English torch,
That it may light my learning with itself,
And in my heart shall it aspire and scorch,
‘Twill burn with passion, this poetic wealth,
Diary Of A Mad Chaos is a daily diary written from March 1996 until today, of which individual books and book series have been created, namely “The Lost Years” an exploration of young, entwined love, the “Wubao In China (猎艳奇缘)” book series which provides an extensive comparative analysis of the cultural differences between Eastern and Western societies, and the book titled “Foreigner (华人)” an exploration of race relations in Australia.
