A Furtive Trip to Club X (Part 1) – Mad Chaos: March 25, 1999

Autumn Embers and Two Roads

The rendering of Autumn has been many and the embers of Summer are now extinguished but a fragment of the past. The path I travel now is new that it has paused the withering and turned it to a contrasting belief of itself. Now withering only comes of the past adversity as I take my foot and step into fortune and new beginnings. The path that I should lead however is one of two and to where I should step will lead me two varying futures.

Firstly, this road that I pursue to find work will one day perform itself upon me. When that day so forth arrives I will probably have to quit the Gym and with it, poetry and all other hobbies and necessities I have felt in past due days. However, if in any case I do not find a job I will be one without money but one still with my poetry. Money for the Gym in coming days will become flagrantly spent upon other things and for that I will be left with nothing to do of a day. Thus, what should my rightful path be and as I know, I still don’t think I know.

Telling to the step I am hopeful to achieve is my heading to an interview on Wednesday but missing out on the Gym. On top of that, I am spending $75 on some pants to wear at the Gym but I will be taking that out of my Gym money so it is pretty ironic. Either I work out with old pants and look the fool for two months or I buy pants and work out for a shorter time but feeling better about myself.

Sleeping Earlier at Last

This fortunate change from dwelling at home to getting out there once again and looking for work has certainly been a turnaround, one that I knew would come when the day was right. Since Monday I have been trying to get myself to sleep earlier and as you can see, by the time I am writing in this Diary it has happened for me. Today I woke myself up at 9:15 a.m. after getting to sleep at 10:00 p.m. last night, a long sleep but one duly needed.

Therefore, I can appreciate a cease of Summer’s embers, Autumn’s withering and a new step towards a new direction. This new direction will be in full swing by next month and thus, it will rightfully have a new name for itself.

This month hasn’t seen much demand of poetry as I have had writer’s block for so long but on top of that I had continual confusion of all the elements and that led to a lost mind in my work. Hopefully that will change by next month but I feel that if I find myself a job it will cease for a month or two before I pick back up on my vibe and have gotten over the novelty of money.

Getting now to the chronology of Tuesday, I tried getting to sleep at around 4:00 a.m. but for the first night in a span of nights to come I was kept up in an irritating wakefulness. The time would have been 6:00 a.m. when I got to sleep and in that time I was thinking to myself “Why don’t I just get up now, get ready, head to the City and then come back home to sleep”. For the past few nights I have been thinking of getting up while trying to get to sleep and with this on my mind I can’t get to sleep.

A Lie About the Phone Bill

However, my tiring mind created my tiring body and for that I slept willfully for the remainder of the morning to duly wake in the afternoon, at around 2:30 p.m. Having myself something to eat I planned my trip to the City and as I was getting ready I heard dad starting up the car. With that I asked if he was going to Campbelltown and as he was I asked him for a lift. That being no problem I got myself ready, placed my movie in a plastic bag that I wanted to swap and then headed to the garage.

Dad gave me $20 for the phone bill as we were leaving for Campbelltown, money for the phone bill. As I closed the garage door and had noticed mum was also heading out with us I gathered they were headed to a park. Both of them thought I was heading off to pay the phone bill and I got dropped off near the Telstra shop but after a simple walk through the Mall I turned around and made my way to the station.

The time must have been around 4:15 p.m. as I left Campbelltown for the City in which I had bought a ticket for King’s Cross. Some ho hum and curious anticipation later I made my way to Central Station and jumping off I then headed on another train to King’s Cross.

Daylight at King’s Cross

With only a brief reminder in my head of where the new Club X was I jumped off the train and coming to the main street of King’s Cross I was surprised at how many people were there, in daylight. Looking at most of the people that jumped off at King’s Cross with me on the train, they didn’t look like hookers or anything else tragic for that matter, just normal people with a hidden adventure just like me.

Making my way up the main street towards the start of ‘Roslyn Street’ I eyed it out and in my barren thought and robotic trance I made my way down the one way street. Walking past two people having lunch out the front of a diner I noticed the Club X directly on the other side of the street. Down the street a little there were thug like people hanging around and feeling anxious to enter Club X I just kept walking down the street.

Rather than saying I had cold feet or I was embarrassed I just wanted to scope out what the dudes down the street were up to, they were just standing around.

Inside Club X

Making my way around the block I walked down ‘Roslyn Street’ once again and this time I made my way into the store. Once in there I made my inquiry about the movie that I had put on hold, the guy knew who I was. Having the movie on a shelf he packaged it for me and paying I made my way around the store before leaving. While there I noticed that the ‘Gigolo’ was there along with other titles of interest and as I headed out I thought this to be a better Club X location.

Hiding the Evidence

Heading back to the station and making it somewhat of a job I placed myself between the lips of the station premises and entered the darkness of the cave. Jumping on a train and then changing at Central Station I sat next to some sleeping guy the rest of the way home. There was a shirt in my plastic bag that I had covered both movies with incase someone noticed the wrapping or had seen what I was carrying, pretty embarrassing.

Sitting behind a business man who looked as if he was a lawyer or in a high class business like that he had a laptop in his artisan hands. Not just some cheap one, it looked as if it was worth $10,000 and as he typed letters on Microsoft Word to E-mail to his friends I sat there in awe hoping one day that this would be me. This laptop which was a darker gray in color had everything that included a CD-Rom, plenty of memory, modem, internet, Microsoft Word and a touch-pad mouse. For most of the trip home I checked out the gadget he was using and was surprised as he got off in Leumeah.

Running Into Nikita

Back in Campbelltown I walked up the stairway to where you would wait for cars to pick you up and walking down was Nikita. Stopping to talk with her as she had also done so I didn’t feel awkward for the fact that I had an adult movie in the bag or that she had said things to Lyssa about me liking her.

Rather, I talked to her but with the same reserved tongue I have had for the past few days where a classic example would be my being unable to chat at the Gym. Showing me that she had a new belly stud I noticed how much diamond like appearance there was in there but didn’t show her much notice. With that and only a minute of conversation we both headed off to what we had to do.

Once leaving I started to just ponder slightly on the subject of belly button diamond studs and jokingly I thought that Virgin Nikita would be a million dollar purity if the diamonds were real. So chaste, so much a virgin but one who seeks attention and thus, the belly button stud does the job well for seeking attention.

A Disappointing Movie

Catching a bus at 7:30 p.m. I made my way home with an anticipative stroll and once home I had asked if anyone had called, there was no calls. This was a good sign as I didn’t have to come up with an excuse as to where I had been for most of the day. The movie I did get to watch that night but I should point out that I was disappointed, it wasn’t much to my interest despite it being based on oral stimulation. So that money was much of a waste but now I will have to wait a couple of months before I can think of buying another movie.

A Call From Lyssa

Getting myself something to eat I received a call at 8:30 p.m. by Lyssa. Our conversation only lasted on the scale of ten minutes and I can’t remember what our conversation was about but I do remember us getting irritated with each other and then saying goodnight. Actually, maybe that didn’t happen but I do remember that we didn’t talk for that long in our night.

Despite my ill remembrance of our conversation I do remember what happened the rest of that night with more crystal clear recollection. For Tuesday night I thought not to enter any words into my Diary because it might take me hours and I wanted to get to sleep early for my interview the next day.

Waxing My Legs

Therefore I just relaxed in front of the television but on my mind through the whole night and nights beforehand I thought to wax my legs. Building that congestional thought in my mind I finally gave in to it and took out what I had left of the waxing gel. Boiling some water I readied my legs knowing that the next day I will be buying the rest of what I needed to wax my legs which also included some healing moisturizer.

The leg waxing began and I do remember that it ached a little but not as much as I had remembered. The first ripping of hair was the hardest but it didn’t turn out to be so painful once done. Waxing only parts of my calves and my shin I had to stop as I started to run out of wax and strips to use.

When completed I had a relaxing shower and then when the time came to be 1:00 a.m. I tried getting to sleep. My eyes were tired around this time and I thought that if I took advantage of that I would get to sleep. Well, there is some truth as I did get to sleep but after waking up at 3:00 a.m. I didn’t get to sleep for the rest of the night. For all that time I kept myself in a half asleep mode as I was almost asleep but never asleep.

This didn’t bother me too much because I had my eyes closed and was resting but it started to get frustrating around 6:00 a.m. When this early morning came and the sun started to silently appear I had some milk to drink from upstairs hoping that it would put me into a sleepy frame of mind but that didn’t work either. This spell of sleepless nights had come to me for one more night and as my alarm rung at 9:00 a.m. for me to get up on Wednesday I was frustrated to say the least.