A Spider Web Welcome for Lyssa (Part 1) – Mad Chaos: March 22, 1999

Two Years Since Jewell

This should be a solemn day, one of loss and regret but the thought of the past and such a loss yields only a trace of solemnity. Two years have now passed since the realized day that Jewell and I stopped calling each other, stopped going out with each other and for a short time, stopped caring for each other. However, that care that spilt onto the second degree of our liking was not of true prosperity but one that was lusted for, unseen and immoral.

With each passing day, time’s shill has helped me in winning away my memories of Jewell, the lustful want and all other misdeeds that transgressed. As the clock ticks over into the early hours of this day of remembrance two years ago I care not to remember it. Those once errant days which quickly turned to tragedy are a thing of the past and today does not have any similarities of that. The only hint of a similarity would be the peace of mind I feel now quite like when Jewell and I decided to break up.

Chronology is three days distant and the catching up is only pages away and thousands of words aloof. Within those three days there was no action other than that of my house and my not going out wasn’t disappointing to me although it would have been nice to hit a club.

Dressing Up for Lyssa

Friday night’s entry was cut short when Lyssa finally arrived at 1:00 a.m. (Early Saturday morning) and turning my computer off as I heard the Taxi pull up I made my way to the front door. To be totally honest, (And not really wanting to, I cringe to be honest) I made myself up a little for Lyssa’s appearance. Figuring that she hadn’t seen me in over two weeks I decided to put on my black cargo pants and black bonds top to answer the front door.

Strolling up my driveway was the first glance I possessed of Lyssa and once she was at my front door I let her in. Clad to her with my eyes as I looked her from top to bottom I had a feeling within me that contrasted to some degree what I felt upon seeing Jewell again. Lyssa looked beautiful but I knew inside of me that the flame had died, I could sense it. Those two weeks that we didn’t see each other gave me time to myself and when I had seen Lyssa again, that dressing myself up was only a test.

The spark between me and Lyssa was gone, I thought so anyway. The both of us haven’t said we love each other for a long time now but upon seeing her I knew that love was a far away island that I couldn’t reach. Love was a distant memory but there was something still looming inside of me as I did not loathe her being at my house, I enjoyed it.

Rather, I would like to think that I have crossed more of the bridge from love to friendship but not yet all the way because I still lust for what sensual times we had as any man with vital organs would do. Apart from that, I still felt the need to cradle Lyssa in my arms when she went to sleep and I still looked upon her when she was sleeping but the feeling was different. However, the bridge from our past relationship has not yet been crossed as my sexual desires bid me to make a date with Lyssa on Friday to visit a hotel room and she accepted.

The Spider Web at the Door

There is a huge spider web at the front of my house on the driveway that a spider only builds up at night. In the past few nights I have had to avoid it while going out but it’s bothersome as it only comes out when the night is upon us making it harder to kill.

Opening the front screen door to Lyssa I could see she had walked through it as she was trying to pluck off some web from her hands. “Oh shit” I said to her knowing that there was a fairly large spider on it, “I forgot to warn you about the spider web”. Lyssa wasn’t too bothered by the spider web as we walked into my room but if she had known what kind of spider was on it the reaction would have been different.

Once in my room Lyssa sat herself on my bed as I turned off the computer and turned on the television for our viewing. For that time Lyssa told me about her night, how she went out with Ali and Penelope to Stan’s house. “I could have walked here from Stan’s house because he lives so close” Lyssa said but she didn’t want to disrespect Ali or Penelope by saying she was headed to my house. Lyssa also didn’t want to ask them for a lift to my house and instead, she caught herself a taxi despite having no spare money.

Keeping My Hands to Myself

Having the same attitude as when Lyssa came over last I didn’t want to make any moves on her or start anything sexual as my horny body does. Usually I would be grappling her boobs, butt or any other body part because it was there for the grabbing and I would usually be the one doing all the touching or starting off with sexual endeavors but this time I was more held back.

The way I had seen it, if Lyssa wanted to lay on me, touch me or have sexual encounters of any sort, all she had to do was start it off. However, Lyssa had her periods and they were fairly heavy so nothing was due for our night anyway.

Through our night, I didn’t touch Lyssa anywhere I shouldn’t have touched her showing restraint. There was no real need for me to do any of those things anyway as the feeling of her being at my house was different, it wasn’t sexual anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I was still horny but I did avoid the brunt of it earlier on in the day with my erratic right hand…

Let me just point out about now that my mind is once again not into the Diary tonight as loathing is predominant in the stakes of chronology. It could be from my not getting to sleep for over 24 hours and having another all-nighter but whatever it is, I’m lacking concentration and getting frustrated at all the little synonyms I’m using in my speech. My mental lapse right now is so bad that I can’t find better explanation words for my lesser attraction to Lyssa than what I have come up with, pitiful.

Movie Night on the Bed

From half an hour into our night Lyssa started getting sleepy as she lay herself on my bed. There was a movie that we were watching so I jumped up on the bed with Lyssa’s invitation and we lay there together watching it. With a little bit of my help Lyssa rolled on top of me in a favoring position and we mucked around playfully but nothing sensually known.

There was no kissing until Lyssa and I kissed each other goodnight and that was only on the cheeks. There was none of my usual touching Lyssa on the breasts but when she did get to sleep I admit that I fondled them when I had my hand hugging her around the waist, how could you resist.

As time passed Lyssa became more tired and laying the ground with a blanket I urged her to come down. Down here Lyssa once again put her legs around me and because I was naturally hard down there I feel that she noticed. The only time Lyssa broke the deadlock was when she had seen I was hard and she put her hand on my member to see if he was but it was nothing special.

Watching Her Sleep

When 2:30 a.m. arrived Lyssa got herself to sleep, still in her old gray pants and a black top that she had newly bought. For the next couple of hours I watched television, mucked around with Lyssa and typed a bit more of my last Diary entry up before I myself got to sleep.

During my watching television I couldn’t resist but to annoy Lyssa in her sleep. Lyssa’s reactions during sleep are my most favored nocturnal vision when Lyssa is now over and seeing her talk in her sleep and her cute smiley face of her dreams beats anything else that happened during our night together.

Lyssa didn’t talk much in her sleep but being so defenseless made her a glutton for my amusing myself at her sleepy expense. Reaching 5:30 a.m. I decided to get myself to sleep but for a couple of hours I was half in and half out of slumber until I finally got myself some proper sleep.

Breakfast and Smokes

In our Saturday morning, I started to wake up around 11:00 a.m. and remembering that Lyssa told me she wanted to get home to tan her legs early in the day I decided to wake her up. When she realized the time she was ready to wake up and get herself home.

Before Lyssa actually went home I made her some breakfast and then seeing that she only had one smoke left she wanted to head down to the shops to buy some more. Soon we were headed down to the shops together but I had to head back to my house some meters down the road because Lyssa forgot her lighter.

Lyssa wanted to have a smoke on the way to the shops and even though I’ve always been against her smoking I ran back to get her a lighter. Our visit to the shops wasn’t much of one, just long enough for Lyssa to buy some smokes and then head back home.

Bumping Into Pari

However, on the way out of the shopping complex I noticed Pari just coming from the Gym. As I stood there to chat with him for a little he told me how he now has a new job as a painter and how he can’t work out that much anymore due to that. The conversation didn’t last that long because I had Lyssa with me and we both wanted to head back to my house so after a couple of minutes we headed off.

Heading back to my house we spent about a half an hour with each other before Lyssa called herself a taxi to get home. Lyssa got upset with me because I wouldn’t catch a bus to Campbelltown with her so she wouldn’t have to go home alone but let’s face it, how pointless is my trip to Campbelltown if I’m not doing anything there. When I finally get to Campbelltown Lyssa probably wouldn’t have money to get me back home because she was running out of money for the week and I feel that she’s a big girl now, she can handle being by herself and heading home.